There is a little story that I want to share with you… its about one of the most inspirational women that I know.
She is the shy kind so I won’t be taking her name…but her story is something that is truly inspiring.
She was 17 when she met her future husband, life was perfect and everything was looking up.
7 months later, they got married … 4 months later she started noticing the signs.
It began with him coming late after work every single day…of course it was just some “important work stuff honey.“
And then it was the smell of perfume on his shirt..which didn’t belong to either him or her.
By now she realized what was going on but she kept living in denial.
The years went by…
And then…the inevitable happened.
Her husband asked for a divorce.
This fake castle that she had made for herself… this fake glass house that she was desperately keeping together, even denying all these obvious signs of infidelity….it all finally came crashing down on her.
That is when reality set in.
She was 45…with no job.. a mortgage to pay..and nothing ..absolutely nothing to her name.
Next came the grief… “could I have done anything different?”, “Should I have confronted him back then?”… and of course along with grief came the self-blaming.
When I began this story..I told you that this was an inspirational story… and you are probably thinking “where the hell is the inspiration in all this?”
Well…I am getting to it.
You see.. a switch flipped in this woman’s head sometime during this grief period… and she realized that something needed to be done.
That’s when she took control of her life…and it is hard to put down in words how amazing it was to watch first hand.
Here was a woman who had a mortgage to pay… who didn’t really have a good education… but here she was educating herself online or through seminars.
In one of those seminars she met her boyfriend…and hopefully her future husband.
She even started a online macramé business….which didn’t really explode…but still gave her a creative outlet and a steady source of income.
Watching this woman transform her life firsthand is one of the most magical things I have ever seen in my life.
When I asked her…what was it that changed in her..what flipped the switch?
She simply said one thing… and that’s what I want to tell you today.
No matter how much life throws at you.. you can always get back up and continue along the road. We all get second chances in happiness.
Now as we take this beautiful journey together… allow me to tell you a bit about myself.
I grew up in a farm in New South Wales and I was raised by a mother who demaded the very best from everyone around her.
Sometimes it did get a little overbearing…but I realized that she wanted the very best for her kids.
After that 3 different things happened which gave me a unique insight in to the human mind.
Firstly, I started working as a Conveyancer i.e. someone who transfers property title. As you may imagine this job requires one to be on their toes. I was forced to become really good at reading people. I did this job for 25 years sharpening my people reading skills over time.
Secondly, I did a life coaching course from the Tad James Now this took some considerable time and energy, but it gave me sooooo many rewards. They finally helped me resolve my issues that I had with my mother via mental reframe. And they also taught me various tools to use in my own coaching.
Thirdly, I met my husband who has been a pillar of support for me my whole life. Before we got married we travelled together across asia and the USA. The different types of people I interacted with during our journey through Iran, Afghanistan, Pakistan, Nepal and India helped me better understand different psyches and personality types. As they say…there ain’t no teacher like real life!
These three very different experiences have given me a perfect mix of knowledge and practicality to read people and to better their relationships with themselves and with other people.
For women who go through a divorce and are looking to get back in the world, what they need first and foremost is self-healing and introspection. These are things that I can provide you with.
As with my friend in the beginning of the story….we all deserve a second chance at happiness.
And more often than not…its after you stumble and hit a dead-end that you truly find what life has to offer.
That’s all for now… I am Marg Hobby
And as Humphrey Bogart says at the end of Casablanca, “I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship.”
It is our limiting beliefs that hold us back from achieving what we truly want. SO in the next article we will do a case study of two of my clients and we will see how, by addressing their limiting beliefs, they were able to let go of their negative baggage.
See you soon!